Because this day is unlike any day before. It came with the sun of sound and left with the chill of night. I sat at my altar today. That’s what I do when I want to connect or when I feel that I need to connect, because something is amiss. The feeling is easy to spot because it wears the face of all things external, and is the first cousin of discomfort. The mind has a way of running with anything I give it, so I limit its access and return to mindfulness when I forget.
Even when I’m not sitting, I like looking over at the candle, how it sets confidently inside a lotus attached to a metal Buddha adorned by Rudraksha mala beads. The light, the way the flame flickers when the air touches it. Wax has poured over at times creating a sense of things being permanent, even though that same hardened wax would transform the moment heat touched it. It runs down the side where the heat can’t change it. It stays there in place like a memory written down. There’s a yellowing black and white picture of my father as a young child held down by a rock I collected while out on a hike at Rodeo Beach in Sausalito. There’s a deck of Osho cards, a tarot of sorts, and a twenty pesos bill. Each serve a purpose. Each serve me in a way that creates an opening for me to learn more about myself and the path inside of the journey I’m on at any given point in time, should I choose to turn toward.
Today, I sat and opened myself up to the highest vibration, to the magnanimous nature of Life and all of its bounty to be gifted me again and again. I understand that nothing separates me from greater access, from the magic, from my ability to walk on water. The mind is the only barrier, but the practice of leaning into the mind enough to understand it, offer it compassion, and then transform it in order to be available to receive, is the way. It is found in the quiet, and we have to be willing to turn down the noise of the world in order to manifest a life breathed on by God.
May it All be. May we Be inside of the All.